Six Sentence Story: Hard Target

Drowning out the voices reverberating around him, Jason held firm the rifle tucked comfortably in his shoulder.

He had imagined himself doing this a hundred times, take a deep breath, hold it in for a second, aim, squeeze and exhale.

He had seen Patrick and David stoically and successfully take down their targets and knew he had a lot riding on this kill.

He could see his mark from the corner of his eye, still, then slowly shifting, then still again and decided not to wait any longer as there was a lot of money at stake, so just as he’d practiced, bang!

He raised his head warily and could see a glum looking Patrick standing by an equally doleful David.

Choose your prize please young sir and with a whoop Jason proudly collected his teddy bear, as his gambling buddies handed over fifty cents each!

Written for Six Sentence Stories, the cue this week is SECOND


About swritings

Author: Ugly Aphrodite (Available on Amazon Kindle) Ah, the need to get your thoughts out there! Happy reading folks!
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19 Responses to Six Sentence Story: Hard Target

  1. ivywalker says:

    Whew! I was getting pretty tense!

  2. Lizzi says:

    Ohhh I LIKE IT 😀

  3. mandibelle16 says:

    Nice twist. I thought they were hunting deer or something. I’m glad they weren’t. Glad he got his teddy bear 🙂

  4. oldegg says:

    The secret was to relax and not be tense…cuddling the teddy bear in future will help too.

  5. luckyjc007 says:

    Great suspense with a surprise ending. Well written. 🙂

  6. nice suspense (and, in a way, an indictment of how terribly violent our culture has become)

  7. valj2750 says:

    I love a story that takes you somewhere and leaves you somewhere else.

  8. Hahaha! I love the cute twist at the end. I thought it was going to be a serious post. LOL!

  9. Niiiiiice. Not only a twist on what he shot, but an equally enjoyable twist on why his buddies had such sour faces. They lost!

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